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Podcast #2: Dark Matter Literature

  Check out the second episode in my AI-generated podcast on the New Mythology for the New Millennium . The playlist is here . The podcast is based on an essay I wrote about my work, which I then submitted to Google's AI. The AI then reconfigured the essay into a podcast format. The essay concerns the dark matter goddess character, aka Isis, and dark matter concept which sit at the heart of my novels-in-progress, Isis Chrysalis  and Ink of the Palimpsest . Isis Chrysalis concerns the actual history of the dark matter goddess, with stories set in the past, present and future. Ink of the Palimpsest is about a group of connected contemporary characters who are living in a reality affected by the dark matter goddess storyline. My Pinterest boards were set up to collect images which resonated with my vision for each of these books, as well as my poetry. See my Pinterest board for Isis .

If There Was No More Time 1: An Offer You Can't Refuse


Image Source: Shutterstock.

We don't live in a world where love conquered all. But we are going to. The reason that the world is so screwed up is because we never received real love. Instead, we got a world filled with substitutes. These proxies depended upon that core deception, which is exactly what made them so addictive: the false and broken promises of soul healing, regeneration and completion. They promised over and over again, and never delivered.

This post is an open letter to one person who knows this formula all too well. He has had to live it and be it his whole life. My dear, I'm going to make you an offer you can't refuse.

Image Source.
The White Rabbit.
Image Source.
That sounds personal, and in a way it is, but I am describing a general problem. Right now, in the back rooms and the basements of social media, anons are discussing the worst fake love substitute of all. The anons think this substance is the nadir of sin that shapes our reality. I don't think it's true (nor do others). But they believe it. They're going to flip the script, and unlike Alice, drag that White Rabbit right out of Wuhan's Wonderland.

What is Real Love?

Elton John - The One (1 September 2010). Video Source: Youtube. Reproduced under Fair Use.

Once in an aeon, love changes time and space. The absolute, ideal love, the most perfect soul mate, would break society and social conditioning, not make them. Perfect love channels and reflects the divine. It doesn't unite souls who should never have been bound together. It doesn't bind people into soul contracts that work "precisely because they break the rules."

The 'one' - what the Jews call Beshert - would be the only other soul on earth who could set your mind and heart free, and you could do the same for them, with all lies, hurts and transgressions forgiven. And in so unlocking the doors to your mutual soul prisons, the terrible cycle of lifetimes of karmic Saṃsāra would be completed, resolved and released. The greatest pairing of lovers would free other souls around them, too. Real love is unconditional and fearless. It lives in absolute truth and the pure freedom that truth brings. This ideal is now common in twin flame circles on the Internet, about which I have blogged here and here.

Fake Love Substitutes

Image Source: pinterest.

The world is filled with flawed approximations of love. The way you know they are fake is because they lead straight to enslavement: money and materialism, jobs and debt; karmic familial obligations; romantic games, sexual drama, lust and porn; conditional marriage contracts, sealed with gold and compressed carbon; conventional and saccharine love-making, symbolized by flowers and chocolate. Don't forget the negative alternatives: violence, infidelity, obsession, drug addiction, and narcissistic abuse. If it starts like a beautiful dream and ends in broken eggshells, betrayal, fear and rage, don't despair. You were merely hoodwinked by fake love.

These simulacra have been generated on a global, industrial scale. The substitutes are alluring; they are so artfully dressed. They make us think, wrongly, that love is something you can consume, wear or eat. Fake love is presented as something you can hold in your hand, like an iPhone. Some of us think it is the balance in our bank accounts, or property we can tax. Or we are taught to believe that love can be measured, negotiated or rationalized in terms of limited physical experiences, which shore up the ego's drive to survive. True love is a transcendent experience of the soul. It cannot be transmuted into a base thing that can be controlled.


The motto 'Ordo ab Chao' ('order out of chaos') implicitly points to true love as the opposite of controlled order; this motto dedicates itself to crushing that highest form of love. But 'order out of chaos' is a false maxim. While true love cannot be controlled or exploited and is a source of freedom, it is not chaos. It shows how limited the idea of order is - as are the people who advocate it. It reveals how frightening real love is, once one is enslaved by fakes.

To be fair, I remember what it was like to live in Wonderland and to believe the fantasies, to be asleep and not know the difference between dreams of love and real love. The photos below come from my Instagram posts on the Montreal Thierry Mugler exhibition in summer 2019 (thanks to -B.). Mugler transformed the glitzy, globalist dreamscape of the 1980s, 1990s, and 2000s into outfits we could take on and off.







It was all right for awhile, playing fantasy roles that seemed real because they came with costumes, or soundtracks, pop culture fantasies, consumer goods, jobs, travel itineraries - and finally, computers. It was all about becoming one of the ants - as my friend, T., said - who can help build, and be part of, the big illusion. So what if the illusion was never that nice to begin with, and love ballads were songs about the impulses of stalkers or murderers? So what if the illusion got darker and darker and darker?

Someone Had to Run the Fake Love World

Image Source: IMGFon.

I know you won't like this, but let us say for the sake of argument that the Illuminati exist. Take it as a fantastical way of saying that someone had to run the fake love world. It's a lousy job, but someone had to do it. Someone had to keep the substitutes coming down the pipeline.

Because true love never went anywhere, but was concealed and suppressed at all costs, we entered into a divided reality. On one side, there was the hidden truth, on the other side, naked fiction. The myth of perfect love persisted, because it exists, like a tiny, sleeping revolution inside every human heart. You cannot get rid of it. The Illuminati exploited the natural human yearning for true love to create a simulacrum which became synonymous with normalcy, order, respectability, achievement, stability, development and prosperity. A modernized machine democratized access to fake love substitutes.

This was the New World Order, which transformed secular humanism and materialism into an atheistic religion, at the cost of the Old World Order of superstitious priests and corrupt aristocrats.

Two Versions of Everything

The Blue-Pilled version. Pet Shop Boys - Always On My Mind (27 February 2009). Video Source: Youtube. Reproduced under Fair Use.

And that is why, in the NWO, there are two versions of everything: a real version for the insiders who are pushing the bullshit, and a fake version for the outsiders who are consuming the bullshit.

Over the past two decades, the alienated fringe players of the Internet boot-strapped their way out of the fake love world. They traveled through the looking glass, fell down the rabbit holes, and emerged into what they termed the 'real world' behind the illusion. They called the fake love world the Blue-Pilled reality and the true love world, the Red-Pilled reality. I have described that process, here.

The risqué, Red-Pilled version? Pet Shop Boys - Always On My Mind (Movie version) (6 November 2016). Video Source: Youtube. Reproduced under Fair Use.

When the deplorables, basement-dwellers, trolls, anons, hackers, alt-media and other members of the Underground arrived in the Red-Pilled space in the 2000s and 2010s, they thought they discovered the secret preserve of the Illuminati, the establishment, The-Powers-That-Be. They didn't really. It was more like they began to blunder about inside the clockwork of the machine that makes social, political and economic management illusions.

Regardless, their investigations were enough to send shudders up the superstructure. The New World Order is not holding up well. Its precepts claim to deify - but actually violate - the core of human nature. The Illuminati don't preserve an order of true love for themselves; they just spend all their time keeping it caged and locked away from all of humanity - as well as themselves - through self-deceptive occult activities. It is so hard, yearning for uniformity while being trapped in dualism. It is so tiring, being the wizard behind the curtain. It is so boring, constantly peddling illusions and sneering at the sheep. And frankly, the company among the co-conspirators sucks. They're ruthless people, all those friends in air quotes, who show up at the same parties, where you have the same conversations with them, again and again, as the years go by. And every time you see them, you know they would stab you in the back in a heartbeat.

Death-Dealing Healers

From Kubrick's Eyes Wide Shut (1999) © Warner; reproduced under Fair Use; based on Schnitzler's Traumnovelle (1926). Eyes Wide Shut Billiard Dialogue. Video Source: Youtube.

To preserve their inner ranks, the Illuminati depend on threats and fear. Expose the lies and you die in reality. This shaky situation brings us to a crossroads, a terrible moment. Right now, we sit on the brink of martial law, justified by a medical crisis. In the above scene from Eyes Wide Shut (1999), Stanley Kubrick shed light on our current quandary. The coronavirus pandemic comes down to the question of whether certain actors in society will play along, most critically members of the medical profession. The tech moguls are already on board with the implementation of martial law and the suspension of civil rights, as are the politicians.

Eyes Wide Shut (1999) [SPOILERS] – Subtitled Subtext (29 July 2018). Video Source: Youtube.

The doctors are a different story. Kubrick presented just such a moment of choice for the film's physician character, played by Tom Cruise. In Eyes Wide Shut, it is through the doctor's already problematic position and dodgy proclivities that he has become acquainted with real power brokers. He infiltrates a grand orgy and glimpses the Illuminati's activities behind the curtain of normal society. He is discovered and is offered a 'can't beat 'em, join 'em,' choice by Kubrick's Powers-That-Be. Because he now knows the sordid truth of larger affairs, the doctor is a liability. He must join the circle of secrecy or die, although initially, the Illuminati plan simply to kill him.

To prevent both possibilities, and to preserve the doctor as an untainted agent in society, a girl at the orgy willingly gives up her life to protect him. This is an incredible act, because it shows that there is a way out of these impossible situations. No matter how ruined you are, or how exalted, how powerful, how cornered or how compromised, you always have a path to redemption.

After the girl dies, the doctor's acquaintance, an Illuminati gate keeper, asks Cruise's character to ignore the value of her sacrifice and to immerse himself in the murderous power games behind everyday life. To do this, he must erase his conscience and devalue the death of girl, because she was a drug addict and a whore and she would have died anyway. Thus, her sacrifice, which kept the doctor alive, is acceptable because her life was already worthless and her death was also already inevitable.

In this scene, the doctor hems and haws, then agrees to join the upper echelon. He struggles a bit, but accepts the idea that the whore's life was worthless. However, because she gave her life to save his life, the doctor is implicitly agreeing that his own life is worthless. Once he has sold out, the demands will never stop, because he has devalued himself. And the next time, the demands will be worse, closer to home, and more dehumanizing. Cruise's character has allowed himself to be trapped in a devil's bargain, when, immediately after the girl's sacrifice, he had the power to expose and destroy the entire illusion. Now, he becomes a player in this matrix of deceit and he can be asked to do anything, at any time. Indeed, the next request is that he give up his own daughter, which occurs quietly in the closing scene in the film.

If the doctor had stood on his conscience and principles, he would reject this nefarious bargain. He would never allow his sexual curiosity, his ego, and his social ambition to cloud his judgement. He would retain his healing ability. Instead, he becomes a death-dealer. He stifles his misgivings, and joins the upper echelon. With Eyes Wide Shut, Kubrick stated that if the medical professional - the life-giver - joins in this orchestrated, murderous illusion, then we have no way out.

In our own current situation, this lesson was already evident in Wuhan. There, medics were rumoured to put still living, elderly patients in body bags. Their mouths were taped shut and they were cremated alive. A job ad at a Wuhan funeral home for additional crematorium workers instructed candidates that they must not be afraid of the screams of 'ghosts' in the ovens.

Medics are professionally conditioned under the protocols of triage to cross the line and kill or euthanize. Triage ethics belong to a much larger discussion. But the point is that this question fits into a bigger architecture and play of interests, to which the medics are blinded by their professional status, ethos and immediate, considerable worries.

In the upcoming nCov crisis, it will be easy to tell the medics that they and the system are overwhelmed; that they have no other options; that patients are suffering and cannot be saved; that patients are expendable because they were elderly or infirm to start with. The truth is that doctors and nurses are both more important and less important than they realize. Unconsciously, they will decide the outcome of a power game.

If medics fall for into the trap that Kubrick depicted, where they justify sacrifice in the name of their self-interest and self-deception, they will destroy themselves and lose all their power. They will become slaves of an order rooted in illusion and death.

However, the larger question of Illuminati vulnerability here is instructive as well. Eyes Wide Shut presented the Illuminati as all-powerful. Tom Cruise's character seems to have no alternative when his friend/handler presses him. The truth is that this supposed group is internally divided and weak. They are clinging to a power rooted in a secrecy which cannot persist. Yes, they can kill people to preserve their order. Yes, they can kill a lot of people. But no, the order will not last, because the whole extravaganza contradicts the most fundamental principle of human nature.

The Way Out

True love lingers on the edges of this malaise as a beautiful and threatening dream. I'm here to tell you: it's not a dream. It will destroy everything this fake world ever had to offer. It's not a possibility. It is a certainty.

Rather like the Illuminati, I once said that you were like the Loch Ness Monster. Much could be said about you, or nothing, and none of it was verified. You know who you are. I don't want you to think I'm a conspiracy theorist, like the person who made the video below. Maybe I just think that Violator is a great album and worth revisiting.

Depeche Mode: Violator (30th Anniversary Epic Chill Edition) (7 March 2020). Video Source: Youtube. Reproduced under Fair Use.

I can only forgive someone whose soul prison is synonymous with the prison that frames our whole world. I can't imagine how hard it must be to exist inside that name, which, with one word, encapsulates the illusion of everything that is beautiful and everything that is wrong.

No Way Out - opening sequence. From No Way Out (1987) OST by Maurice Jarre. Reproduced under Fair Use. Video Source: Youtube.

Do you think I don't know that you suffered too? Do you think I don't know that the Illuminati are deeply unhappy people? They aren't happy now, and if their plans were realized, they would be miserable in their inverted utopias. With all the useless eaters gone, life would be so tedious and empty, because all you would have is each other, and the demons and robots and the simulacra for company, which quite frankly, is all you have now. With the substrata gone, all you would have left is a mirror, in which you could explore your endless limitations. And you would end up killing each other.

Image Source: Digital Journal.

Are you not lonely, up there in your gorgeous palaces? Don't you yearn for real love as much as everyone else does?

Now I know why you were always on my mind. Not to be your Beshert, but to serve as messenger for the choice you face now. You don't have to run away into the mountains or hide in your bunker.

This time, it is not - as Kubrick depicted - the all-powerful Illuminati member making a no-way-out offer to the hapless citizen who has crossed a line. This time, the roles are reversed, and the individual members of the so-called Illuminati, like you, must make a choice. You were never better than any of us. Not intrinsically, not spiritually, not morally, not physically. If all of humankind died to construct your final, vaunted order, you would die from utter despair and mutual violence. You can choose to help the people you scorned and spurned, choose to destroy the illusion of fake love and help build a new reality based on true love. And just like the death of illusion, you have a chance now, for the first time in your life, to become your own man and not be just your name. It's an offer you can't refuse.

The message is delivered. As far as I'm concerned, my soul contract with you is fulfilled and done.

Frankfurt/Main Römerberg bei Nacht (at Night) in HD (5 June 2013). Video Source: Youtube.


A Note on 'If There Was No More Time' Posts

To follow up on my February 2020 posts, If There Was No More Time and The Coronavirus Consciousness, I am doing a series of posts here with cryptic testimonies to and about particular people and situations. Given the nCov pandemic, there are some things I should say, in case the clock is ticking more quickly than usual. If it isn't, these posts can be taken as some personal statements about themes in my work.

This post provides background for my poem, "Dream Surface," which will be published soon in my first chapbook, Dark Palace. My pinterest board for "Dream Surface" is here. "Dream Surface" is not necessarily about finding that 'one' love, but about dreaming about 'the one' so intensely that you wake up into a new reality.



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